Wa Yo Yogi

Leanne Kitteridge's adventures in Yoga

From Seeker to Finder October 24, 2011

Narita Temple, Japan

” Eventually as Seekers, we must become Finders”~ Paul Mueller- Ortega

I spent 4 days with Paul Mueller-Ortega in Montreal this month. I had known about Paul for many years through various yoga friends- most of them being Paul’s first students of Blue Throat Yoga. I decided that what emanated from these teachers is something I also wanted to embody so I signed up to meet Paul and become initiated in Neelakantha Meditation. I was worried that with certification going on, and then adding studying with Paul, I would be inundated but funny enough I was certified right before meeting him~ funny how the shakti works……

Paul gave a beautiful set of talks and practices over our 4 days together. He drops words like” profundity” as if he was saying “apple”~ amazing lecturer and one of the most intelligent beings I have ever met- yet incredible sweet and accessible. Nectar and fire most definitely. Though there were so many resonant teachings offered over the fours days one of the phrases that Paul said went off like a bell that has yet to stop ringing: – “Eventually , as Seekers, we must become Finders”. In my own thoughts I have pondered these words since I have returned.

So, what is a Seeker? A Seeker, in my my own words, is one who has questions- big questions. “Why am I here?” “What is my purpose?” ” How can I find happiness?” “Why do bad things happen to good people?” – there are a million others but you get the idea when I say big questions. In fact, I can actually say that just by reading my blog right now you are a Seeker. We all seek clarity, meaning, and understanding at some level and many of us go actually looking for it- you are probably one of them.

So, what is a Finder? Well I guess a Finder would be someone who as actually found an answer to at least one of their profound questions. How do we move then from Seeker to Finder? This is then the journey of practice…this is the journey of yoga~

If we follow the philosophies that inform Anusara Yoga, then we would say to find the answers, to become the Finder, we must do two things: recognize that the answers are actually inside of us ( Om namah shivaya gurave) and have a map, teacher or technique for the journey. I know that many realized beings have gone from Seeker to Finder without these things but for most of us we do need some help. ( or more specifically, I needed help). There are many maps and techniques to go from Seeker to Finder. Paul’s technique is meditation, Anusara Yoga’s technique is the UPA’s ( Universal Principles of Alignment), and there are many other tools, techniques, and teachers out there- all valid and all eventually taking us to where the answers can be found inside of us.

I taught this theme all week using the UPA’s. Patience as the heart theme with 1st principle- Set the Foundation and Open to Grace- as the main UPA to emphasize. So let’s go on the journey from Seeker to Finder through the UPA’s!

Set the Foundation and Open to Grace~

For any journey we set out on, we have to prepare. Setting our foundation is preparation for how, with what quality, we want to move forward on the path. Rather than being just a physical setting of the foundation it is an embodiment of saying ” I want to know- I want to become the Finder”. Opening to Grace then becomes the soft sweet opening of your connection to the realization that the journey is one of ongoing revelation. Passing through the layers of ourselves that block us from finding the answers that are right there inside. Invoking Grace in our journey allows her revelatory power to melt and dissolve the veils that hinder us from going deep inside- to the deepest connection of the heart where the Finder seeks answers. It is a journey of patience.

Muscle Energy~

As we draw in to the focal points with our outter gross body, we are also drawing deeper into the subtle body- adding our own desire to know, to understand ( iccha) to help to penetrate through the veils. How much do you hug in? As much as your desire to find the answers to these deep questions. We add our own efforts to the power of Grace.

Inner Spiral~

We move once again deeper into the back body- the place where Grace enters us from. We continue to harness her revelatory power as we continue deeper into the journey. We move slow and with great sensitivity as we travel together deep into our heart- the place where the answers reside.

Outter Spiral~

We had more fire and light to the journey as the ever more subtle layers we move through become more difficult to navigate. Our desire to Find once again reignites our heart as we root our tailbone.

Organic Energy~

Expanding out from the focal point in all directions- we create the optimal revelatory space for the answers to flow freely out of our hearts. As we breathe and continue to hug in and expand out on the exhales- we further clear the veils and the revelatory aspect of practice becomes fully embodied.

I found it interesting how easily the UPA’s fit this phrase. Sometimes, when I theme, it can be a difficult linking of thoughts, feeling and actions to make my theme and the physical class truly one but this was almost like the shakti just poured herself out over the paper. It shows how well these teachings from both John and Paul are developed as they dance together to make such a beautiful class.

I would have to say that I am still a Seeker- but I am also a Finder. If I look back over my 7 years with Anusara, I can honestly say I have found some of the answers to those profound questions I came to the practice with. I still have questions though~ how wonderful to have teachers, practices and techniques to help me reveal them.

“Seek, and ye shall find” – Matthew 7:7

 

How Do You Climb A Mountain? August 22, 2011

I climbed  Mt. Fuji in 1992- coming up 20 years now. I remember how hot it was at the beginning station during the day- upwards of 30 degrees Celsius and we waited patiently for the sun to go down. Ideally you climb Mt.Fuji in the chill of the night so you can be at the top to watch the sun rise over the land. As we started our ascent on the slippery volcanic rock I just kept thinking, ” One foot after the other- one step at a time. Don’t go so fast you burn out from the elevation, don’t go so slow you get cold and cramp up- one step at a time.” So step by step we climbed the mountain.  Most climbers had wooden walking sticks with us that had a Japanese flag and some small chimes attached.  The rhythmic sound of bells accompanied all the climbers steps echoing brightly in the utter darkness. I chatted occasionally with those in our group but mostly I just listened and felt- we were walking up the greatest geographical icon in Japan. A mountain whose mere glimpse will often bring tears to Japanese eyes. Yet the path wasn’t particularly scenic it’s mostly black volcanic scree and it was also the middle of the night. I sometimes would look up the mountain to see little lights ahead of us- small headlamps attached to helmets or hats-  like fireflies dancing to the sound of the bells.

I would get tired on some parts or slide and slip on others but I just kept putting one foot in front of the other, trying to find a rhythm in the mountain- something I could follow. I wasn’t a yogi in those days- I was a 22 year old straight out of university following my dream. Living in Japan, climbing Mt. Fuji- all these radical new experiences that I was trying to absorb. It was like trying to do your dance to some music you had never heard- clumsy, awkward, and naive. Somewhere about half way up something changed and it was like the mountain and I were suddenly in relationship. The rhythm came and the effort softened and suddenly the dark wasn’t quite so intimidating.

We reached the top at 3:30 am and had to wait until 5 for the sun to rise. It was -3 Celsius at the top. I could barely make out a torii gate as we shoved cans of hot coffee into our pockets to keep warm. At 5 am the sun rose on Fuji, a line of orange to start and then breaking into reds and yellows- so bright it was almost blinding. The torii gate became illuminated in the morning colours and we looked out over the lakes and mountain below us. We had made it- one step at a time.

I thought about this climb a lot lately because I have often thought of the certification process as climbing a mountain. We often start out with a group of friends, a guide and high energy. As the journey continues some friends take different paths, others give up. Our guide stays with us for a certain amount of time and then they too leave us- they have taught us all they can and they point to the path ahead which you now follow on your own. You get tired, you want to quit. At that point you and the mountain have to come into relationship. It’s just the two of you now. One step at a time, one foot in front of the other….and suddenly….without quite believing it’s true- you are at the top.  The sun has risen and you have “upeksha”, the wide sweeping vision like that of an eagle, and what you realize is that the mountain was you all along. You were literally climbing through the layers of yourself. As soon as you realize that, the mountain dissolves and you are left with a new path in front of you….that leads to another mountain. One foot in front of the other…. beyond certification.

On the day that Anusara turned 14 years young, I reached the top of the mountain and passed my certification video. To my friends who started this climb with me- I love you all. To my teacher, Christina Sell, who encouraged me to climb the mountain- thank you for your belief in me. To my teacher, Robin Golt, who let me radio in to home base when the climb got tough- thank you for your wisdom. To my husband and children who put up with this long climb of 6 years- I could never have attempted this without your support. There are no words for all the love I have for you. To my teacher, John Friend, who gave me the best damn map to get up that mountain- thank you and deepest gratitude. You made sure I saw all the highlights and beauty along the way. To my father who’s work ethic never allowed me to give up- I miss you- I know you wouldn’t get this yoga thing but it’s a big deal. To all of you who I have met along the way- thank you for your encouragement . You know who you are.

Love and light~

” It is not the mountain we conquer but ourselves”~ Sir Edmund Hillary

 

Anusara Harmonic Recalibration Retreat in Maui/ May 2011 June 7, 2011

I purposely did not take my computer to this retreat…. so it could be a retreat. I have to say I felt a little guilty as I usually blog from every training but I really wanted time every night to just relax and absorb the teachings. What this makes for on another level then is a more reflective blog. So rather than from my usual ” in the trenches” mode of writing, this will have a little more of a sense of impressions…shadows and themes of the week as what was most potent hopefully rises to the surface.

First of all this was a crazy event to have happen. I had planned out my year to spend May 21st in Christchurch with the Merry Band for my birthday- first ever trip to New Zealand. I was sacrificing my yearly Japan training to do it but I have roots in NZ and thought why not. Well, we all know the terrible crisis that rocked through Christchurch; and the trip was cancelled. I thought about trying to make it for Japan training when tragically the Tohoku area of Japan was devastated. It seemed John’s tour was not going to go as planned this year. Suddenly Maui was revealed as a new venue for a training ; the shakti provided a beautiful alternate- on days I could travel!

The days were divided into morning talk and meditation, a breakfast break, morning practice, long lunch break, and afternoon talk- 7am to 7pm for 5 days. I have to say it was one of my favorite schedules. We did not get in the usual two asana practices a day as we do during most trainings, but the practices we did do were full on.

Day one started with an introduction to the theme of the week: Harmonic Recalibration. I laugh as I write this because I am not honestly sure if it was calibration or recalibration but really- you get the point. Everything in the world is vibrating- Yantras and sacred geometry are forms of this greater vibration. Mantra is sound as vibration. We started with the most familiar sound to us- the invocation. John explained that OM as the form A*U*M represents the “A” as the first sound of most languages- the first sound in Sanskrit and “U” is the 16th and final sound in Sanskrit. The alphabet itself contains vowels and consonants. The vowels are refined- they can be likened to Shiva and the consonants represent the outer form- Shakti. The “AU” is sung together as “O” and the “M” actually has a dot over it called an anuswara ( not to be confused with Anusara) which gives it a reflection of the previous sound- so “M’ sounds like “ng” and goes up through the palette to vibrate in your head. You do not actually close your mouth to make the “M” sound. Try it sometime…

He went on to say that the God you hold in your heart- no matter the name it is given, vibrates at OM- and so do we. Even the universe has a sound- the sound of radiation- a background hum to the universe. ( you can check out this link I found to John G Cramer– prof of physics at U of W.. Can you hear the OM in that?)

The Maha-mantra “Om namah shivaya” – has been chanted now for 1800 years- its vibration has been expanded by  the length of time it has been chanted. It takes form in the akashic space- “namah” we bow out of awe- we are uplifted not subordinated. “Shivaya” goodness, auspicious, sacred- that which is at the essence of all that awes you is benevolent. Every time we chant we expand the global mind and collective consciousness through it’s vibration. Part of our practice is to get so sensitive we can attune to that harmonic vibration- to the vibration of spirit. ” If you can attune to spirit it’s all there”- John Friend

John then introduced our first drawing lesson. The dot and the circle- the circle represents the absolute realm- no form, time, sound, or space. In Buddhism, they refer to the circle as the void- shunyata– but in Shiva/ Shakti tantra we see the void as purna– full- full of yet unstruck potential. The bindhu– the dot- then becomes the way in which the unmanifest becomes manifest- it is manifestation that comes out of the attributes of the circle; the attributes of the Absolute: Sat Chit Ananda Svatantrya Shri Purna Spanda.

SAT: “IS”ness , truth

CHIT: conciousness, awareness, self knowing, light that is self reflective

ANANDA: our soul is bliss, love, joy

SHRI: Goodness, only goodness, no concept of evil

SVATANTRYA: ultimately unbounded freedom

PURNA: fullness of creative potential

SPANDA: how the one becomes the many, pulsation and vibration as waves

Manifestation then follows a deep order and organization ( krama)  from this seemly empty place- because really it is not empty. “ In what appears to be empty is spirit- not a vacuum or a void. There is nothing that is no thing”- John Friend

The week, John explained, was about cultivating direct knowing through practice- the direct truth of experience. For us to understand the absolute we have to understand from the relative- because that is where we are. The absolute is beyond words- but words are all we have. We use numbers to express something that is infinite, we use sequence to describe what is not linear and time to describe that which is beyond time. In my words,  we are being described a strawberry without actually ever having tasted one. This week was about having a taste- an indescribable taste.

To get that first taste we have to go to the first principle: sensitivity. This is the first practice of attuning to spirit. Our sensitivity is directly related to one’s clarity. John likened it to rust on an antenna. I would go as far to say that our yoga practice then become the mechanism which cleans some of the rust off our antennas. This image of the antenna seemed to stay with me as John talked about the “highest opportunity to see the dancing delight of the universe”. We receive this clarity and then there is a transformation and finally a transmission back out. We start to create clarity in others. Everything during the week was in a process of relationship: receiving and transmitting in a relation to the energy of spirit.

The body than becomes a yantra- a condensation of spirit in form- made of vibration that all starts from that one bindu in the circle. The practice that day then became of one of co-participating with nature- seeing the patterns in our hands and feet that are slower, grosser vibrations of  the Absolute. We started with just the hand and seeing the order of the finger pads, the meta carpels, the 4 corners laying them out in krama ( deep order) while staying sensitive to the bigger energy. The flavour was much different then “do this in order because it is the order” it was do this as a way to be receptive to the bigger energy- to create the body into a pattern that contains the vibration of the highest consciousness. Dance with the divine in you- make sacred art. It was a very powerful and beautiful practice.

After our break- which I spent swimming far off into the ocean- we gathered for our afternoon session which I like to call art class- sacred geometry simplified. I wish I could produce nice drawings on my blog but all I have is my notebook which I copied for you to see. (Please don’t laugh at my spelling or poor drawing.) We drew two over lapping circles horizontally  which represents Shiva/Shakti. The part of the two circles that overlaps becomes an oval that can represent the yoni (shakti) or the lingham (shiva). By putting a bindu in the middle of both circles you can make a triangle in the top part of the oval. We then took the upward facing triangle ( shiva) and downward facing triangle ( shakti) . In the absolute realm shiva is still and shakti is active- as the two pass through the magical mirror of maya they become reversed and the upward facing triangle of shiva becomes action ( yang- masculine- fire) and the downward facing triangle of shakti becomes reflection ( yin- feminine- water). This was our introduction to the shri yantra which John would expound on through the rest of the week.

Day one notes

Day 2 started with John asking about our sankalpa– our intention. Our intention is based on the degree of our will ( iccha). One of the interesting things he brought up was that before intention comes our darshan– our viewpoint. For one of the first times,  John started to more heavily draw out the Buddhist philosophies and how they align with Shiva/Shakti tantra. He said that “ even though the Buddha had everything there was still a hole. That hole is God given- we do not feel full” this longing to feel full is what spurs us into action. In the Buddhist philosophy, they say ” sarvam dukam” – everything is suffering. John flipped this around to say in Anusara we say ” sarvam sukham” everything is flowing. These two terms “ sukha” and “dukha” we have come to know as ease and suffering but they actually come from the description of a wheel.  When a wheel turns true and causes no friction or wobbling  that wheel is said to be “sukha“.  “Dukha” is the wheel that is off. If the wheel wobbles and it bothers you that is suffering. The wobbly wheel will create heat from friction. So we chose our view- to see suffering or to see flow. Your view becomes your philosphy of life- the way you look at things is also your shradda ( faith).

Your view is important because it determines how you direct your mind- how you imprint the akashic field. Wherever you have directed the mind the most becomes like the deepest hole you have dug in the field of the akasha. This is where you will go during under stress. We can dig out so to speak- we can chose to change our view if it has not served us. You really are what you think. So this becomes your darshan. In Anusara, our darshan then becomes the first line of the invocation “ Om Namah shivaya” I see the good. What is your darshan? It’s a great consideration. I ended up teaching a whole class on “is your glass half empty or half full?- how do you see the world?”. The responses I received from students were interesting and brought out a lot of deep questions and stories after class.

During the practice John talked more about the invocation and specifically about the meaning of words in the lines.  For example,  “satchidananda murtaye“: “murtaye” is from the root ” murti” meaning form. (Some of you may be familiar with statues of Hindu gods being called “murtis”). Therefore  Truth, Consciousness and Bliss take form. The form is an imprint of the formlessness, an imprint of the Absolute. Because we also contain these qualities,  we can take the form of the bliss of consciousness.

At the level of the Absolute there is no relationship. Relationship has the connotation of the relative world- the world where we live our lives. The  word “ratio” is a term we use to describe the relationship between two numbers or measures. Form is constructed in nature through ratios. For example the ratio between your hand and your forearm is  1.618- this is known as the Golden Ratio. So the line ” nishprapanchaya” – is saying that all 5 elements ( pancha) are held together in relationship. The form can arrange itself in relationship there is intelligence to the manifestation of form. “Niralambaya” , John said, was relationship held in partnership but it doesn’t need the support to exist but chooses relationship to enjoy life more. “Tejase“, the light or luminosity, then allows us to see that all relationship has deep order- we become “enlightened”.

We traced our hands and then drew the five elements with their glyphs down on paper.

Thumb= space – it is represent by a dot- a bindu

Index=  air- represented by a circle

Middle= fire- represented by an upward facing triangle

Ring= water- represented by a downward triangle

pinky= earth- represented by a square

The foot works exactly in the same way. You can have fun playing with your feet and hands in poses and seeing which part lifts up – which part fidgets- how it feels if you change an ” element”. The body is a fractal or hologram for the whole web and the hands and feet, even the ear, then are microcosm of the whole. This is one of the reasons why acupuncture or reflexology in a foot or ear can affect some deeper part of the body.


We had a beautiful evening concert that second night and suddenly my girlfriend Jean bumped me and pointed up- there in the dark night around  the luminous moon was a circle. We had the circle and the bindu…just like John had been teaching. It was one of those crazy things that happens around trainings – you literally start seeing exactly what you have been learning- everywhere!

Day three started with a clarification of the Shiva/ Shakti tantra that informs Anusara yoga. John explained he used the tantric system because it really had the best explanation to the questions of life: ie. If God is good why do bad things happen? If the Absolute is completely free why would it chose to bind itself? The energy is so free that s can choose to create an energetic appearance of being limited. It can bind part of itself but does it without ever reducing or taking away from itself. It is never reduced or disturbed as it creates a world of limitation. Out of freedom and delight it can play a game with itself: it can express itself artistically. Why do children play? It is not for outcome or conditions- it is for the fun of it. The absolute does the same and we call that play lila. The Supreme literally plays hide and seek with itself.

When we have the relationship of hide and seek, love and loss, we have revelations about ourselves. Accomplishing what you thought you could not do- that is revelation as well. The Supreme cloaks itself like a magician to create abuta– astonishment and wonder- the child that squeals with delight as you pull your hands away to reveal again what they thought was gone. The very dark times in our life can often hold the most revelation- look back at your experiences and I am sure you will find one like that.

One of the coolest things John talked about was the story of the caterpillar. There is an actual stage in the chrysalis where the caterpillar complete liquefies and reforms to the butterfly. I had to go look this up because it so captured my imagination ( here is great link). He explained that there is a point in the cycle where we can become something else- we can recreate ourselves. Concealment and revelation are happening in unison, sometimes it takes a while to see that. There is always a cycle of creation, highest refinement and dissolving happening- in our own bodies, in nature, in our experiences.

In Anusara, we use the three Goddesses: Saraswati, Lakshimi and Kali to explain this cycle. Saraswati is the beginning of the cycle and is represented by the colour white. Lakshimi is the height of the cycle and is represented by the colour red and Kali is the end of the cycle- the dissolving- and is represented by the colour black. Saraswati’s name has the root “sara” in it- to flow ( as in Anu”sara”) and her color of white represents purity and you will often see her holding a stringed instrument called a vina. She represents the beginning of the wave pattern a climb that brings with it the beginning of language and fundamental music. There is an innocence and purity at the beginning of the cycle. Lakshimi represents the fullness of the cycle- fullness of power, fertility, creativity. She takes the developments of the first cycle- ie. the alphabet and basic music- into greater complexity and refinement- the highest artistic beauty at the crest of the wave. Kali is the downward pulsation of the wave- the devourer of time- that which takes back in all the creative power to wait to start to create again. Within each of these cycles is smaller cycles- all parts of the cycle have a purpose and can be an entry point into the center- into the bindu.

That afternoon was a wonderful potpourri of information which I think I was too absorbed in to write proper notes or it could have been distraction as it was the day that my friend fell out of a tree in the mango grove right before lecture and dislocated his shoulder. It was a bit of a crazy start to the afternoon- I think John would agree. One of the notes I did make at the beginning that really sat with me was “We live this life to wake up“. I talked with my husband about his at some length after I returned and mused how much simpler life was in some ways “before I woke up”. Now I am not saying life was better, in fact I think it is supremely better now, but there is a level of responsibility that happens when you wake up- we don’t get to stick our head under the covers anymore and cry ignorance. It can be rather upsetting when you look around your life and the light of consciousness shines on some things you would rather not deal with- and now you HAVE to deal with them. I will leave it at that for this blog but I may go a little deeper in that vein on a future date.

John spoke of shri and defined it as the sacred, divine, auspicious- the highest goodness; that which we consider to be sacred. He explained that is why when we see something beautiful we immediately become reverent- the highest level of beauty reminds us we are all divine. We also touched on a touchy subject for some- beauty or auspiciousness that has been stolen by that which is malevolent. Specifically we spoke of the swastika. That yantra which is so auspicious in India that people draw it on their door steps to ward off evil and bring in luck , and yet,  when we see it,  we feel revulsion and sorrow for the hate it contained for only a few short years. Just think- a symbol that represented good for 1000’s of years was completely corrupted in 12 years. Can it ever be recovered or is the samskara so deep in the akashic field that it is beyond reclamation?

From there we talked about the fact that we wake up in relationship. At the relative level the highest purpose of relationship is love. Love ( prema) then is the relative slow vibratory form of bliss (ananda). So relationships are mixing of energy fields. We spoke a little on what then are the key elements for your highest relationship- your highest beloved. The first element is trust-similar vision- how you see the world. The second element was compatibility of mind- ability to communicate- emotionally and intellectually. The third was polar energy- yin and yang. All of us have both energies in us- it is not male and female in gender but in energy.

Day four morning was a meditation on the bij sounds of the chakras. We started out by talking about the view of maya in Tantra vs Vendanta. You will often hear maya refered to as “illusion” but in Tantra we call it the “magical mirror” where the absolute reverses itself as it passes through. You can use this idea to think that as the universe breathes out we take our first breath; and as we expel our last exhale the universe inhales and takes us home. As above so below- the universe is breathing and therefore we breathe. Tantra also looks at incarnation as a gift- it’s not like you screwed up and now you are back. John recommended we become a connoisseur of life~ we get better and better and then we come back and we enjoy it even more: this is the Tantric perspective.  This perspective is our darshan– we keep it fresh, we question, we experience. We then made the chanting of the bij sounds of the chakras like a science experiment inside each of us; letting the auspiciousness of the vibration open us up. We would receive the divine in the form of the inhale to manifest it into that particular chakra and let it vibrate. We went up the chakras 2 or 3 times- focusing on the elements and color of the chakra as we did it. I liked the idea of bringing the divine in through the form of the breath- it gave a meditation I had done previously a whole new perspective.

Practice that day was amazing- back bending heaven I seem to recall. The talk was fascinating to me as we covered so much material and some really new stuff. John said basically he was getting ready to set the foundation for his tour next year  including Egypt and a broadcast from the Mayan pyramids. John will be in Tulum when the Mayan calendar ends. I am not going to get into what that means or the significance but just to let you know in case you want to join the merry band. John talked numbers and base systems to start with. For example the number 108 which is an auspicious number is made up of 12- the number of the universal and also the guru- and the number 9- the number of the individual and also the top number in our base 10 numbering system. The number 12 is actually from the base 60 system- 60 minutes in an hour, 360 degrees, 12 hours in a day. The base 12 system was used by the Egyptians and Babalonians. The Mayans used a base 20 system- and it is this system that the Mayan pyramids were built on. I am sure there will be more interesting lectures on this as the year goes by. Might be worth some self research if you are going to study with John this year.

John also discussed the periodic table as being a chart of sound or vibration. The columns of the table just are more refined vibrations as they move down the chart. It’s incredible that I never even thought of that approach to the chart…makes me think I could have been a much better science student if John Friend was my teacher! So even though they discover new elements- the chart dosen’t get more columns.  The size of the atom decreases from left to right, and increases from top to bottom: and atoms are vibrations. If this is confusing think of the Tantra tattva chart and it might become a little clearer. The conversation veered into GMO’s and modification of food and what that does to the vibration and what it does to us as we ingest it- makes you think a little more about having a fake sugar in your coffee. Your body recognizes the vibration of sugar from a plant…might not be great for you but at least it is natural. Messing with our food is literally messing us up- from the inside out. Another thing that we can’t hide under the covers from ….

The last chart we copied down before practice was the astrological chart. I read my horoscope occasionally but I have no deep knowledge of the astrological calendar. The chart of years moves in reverse order to the monthly one we follow for people’s birth month. Each age last 720 years. We are currently in the Age of Pisces (though at some level this is heavily debated) and moving into the Age of Aquarius. The two previous ages were Aries and Taurus. If you look at the glyphs for these ages there is some interesting notes for the history buff. The Age of Taurus, with its bull glyph,  is known to be an age where the worship of bulls was common in Assryia, Egypt and Crete.  Aries, represented by the ram, was a time in history where various gods rose with the name contain that sound: Rama, Bhrama , Ra, Abraham etc. and the sacrifice of sheep replaced that of bulls. The Age of Pisces marks the rise of Christianity and the glyph of the fish- still seen on countless bumper stickers across North America. The Age of Aquarius  is marked by a glyph of two waves- which may represent not just water but is speculated to represent vibration, electronics,( wifi?) etc. Perhaps the age of Aquarius being harkened in as an age of awakening, is that we will be able to use technology to create freedom. Though I do have to say I feel like a slave to my computer a little too often….

The afternoon in the mango grove was calmer that day and John spoke of many of the teachers such as Babamuktananda and Maharaji and their shakti and some crazy stories of things they could do. He said that pictures of your teachers then are yantras that are passing the shakti of that person. The form then holds the vibration- holds the shakti. There is a great little picture we have of Maharji with his hand held up and we have always found it mesmerizing. It’s like it contains some special message that we have not yet figured out- a yantra we have not yet deciphered. John talked about never showing the souls of your feet towards your guru. We all started nervously tucking our feet under ourselves and John laughed and said God is everywhere- so don’t worry about your feet around him.  He said that spirit and blessings are also in the feet. He told the story of Muktananda getting completely recalibrated one night walking home with the gift of his guru’s shawl-wrapped sandals on his head. One mile with his guru’s shakti sandals changed his life!

Anywhere we create a place to worship , prana will accumulate in that area. If we worship at certain hours, then prana will circulate more in that specific time- we create a momentum so to speak- a swirling around a bindu. This harnessing of energy can be used as a practice. John suggested we journal our mind for the last hour at night. By using mantra to anchor ourselves we can be in a beautiful space even in intensity. We can then cultivate what we think as we dissolve this cycle of the day. The energy of that last cycle is what we carry into the next. If we carry momentum and our anchored in our darshan, we are less likely to get knocked off balance. Something to consider if you watch TV before falling asleep every night.

Shri yantra and sacred geometry notes

We spent that afternoon learning to draw the shri yantra– really- it was hilarious.  We were breaking into fits of laughter as we tried in desperation to follow John’s drawing- some of our renditions were so bad! I was sitting right up front and I still messed up. I have since bought myself a yantra colouring book- maybe that will help…. The book that John was using to draw from I also bought and recommend for further study Yantra: The cosmic Symbol of Tantric Unity by Madhu Khanna. The shri yantra itself is a pictographic vibratory diagram of the tattva chart- it represents how shiva/shakti bring everything into creation. The upward and downward triangles represent these two energies. I am still reading right now and have a very raw understanding of it so I will not continue but I find the book very useful.

Day 5 started as guru vs guru principle. For the guru principle is present at anytime and any place- we can learn to access it wherever and whenever through skilled means. John explained that serendipity is not raw luck. It is the revelatory power of the shakti at work. I see this more and more in my own life and I can see that really nothing is random- it is all the actions of the shakti. My favorite phrase when things go a little haywire is ” the shakti is messing with me” and rather than freak out I look to see what it is I am supposed to be awake to in that moment. It is a much calmer way to react to life’s obstacles.

Shakti has a frequency that is infinite. It can be felt as low energy or high energy in a space that we can get recalibrated to: it can change our mood. I am sure you have had experiences like that. When we hear the truth, when we see beauty we are momentarily shifted by that vibration- we have an experience beyond mind- it is intuitive. It may only be a second or two but that’s all you need for a revelation. Our practice is about learning to be skillful in holding that resonance- extending it. So through the dharma- in alignment with Grace- the guru principle reveals you. That which opens the curtains and brings in the light- a person, an object, an experience can be the guru. Once we have had moments of the curtains opening, and become more skilled at holding the vibration, then everyday becomes a moment of shri. We become shifted at some level. Everyone is different. We could all be watching the same sunset, but one person will have an unbelievable experience. We often look outside ourselves to seek these moments, but it is always there inside of us and there are practices to connect you with that guru principle.

For example, John spoke of the fact that the shakti is not air but in the air. So when we do ujayi pranayama we set up a resonance with the shakti. We try to hold that resonance we find and use it to ride the waves of doubt and fear,anger and sadness. The waves are all from the same source. You can literally ride the wave of anger straight back to the bindu of love. This is a very Tantric way of thinking- anything can be a gateway. Anything can be a gateway because the shakti is in everything: and shakti is always full of Grace.

We then did pranayama and traced the breath back to the bindu and waited and served the shakti in the air. You don’t grab or push- you just open to it and it comes in. We worked with a few pranayamas including nadi shodana. John explained that there are 5 nadis in each nostril, which relates to the five elements, and one can actually get good enough to affect and manipulate the different elements thorough their pranayama practice. The energy in us changes every 2- 2.5 hours so you can use this understanding to align and calibrate yourself with what time it is. We can garner energy or slow ourselves down as long as we know the bigger energy. Day 5 was the top of the cycle- the accumulation of 5 days of shakti- the purnahuti. There was extra magic available that day- a high resonance we could calibrate with. You could chose to shift right there- I like to think of it as “make a wish day”….. what is your highest desire?

Someone asked a question about people in dreams and John discussed how people are doorways to the energy- the shakti. So if you dream of someone it may not be that person specifically that you are engaging with but the energy that form takes. The forms will change but the shakti comes to us at our level of understanding- even in our subconscious. May be interesting to journal who comes up on your dreams and what the energy of that person means to you. I dream of my dad a lot when I have questions- his energy was one of love and stability- he calms me down, makes me feel brave. I feel empowered after I dream of him. Ram Dass often speaks of his teacher, Maharaji ( Neem Karoli Baba) being a gateway so I understood this from my talks with him. Don’t get lost in the form- get lost in the energy behind the form.

Day 5 practice was in relationship to the guru principle. There is a leader and a follower- a dancing couple. But the dance does not begin with the leader; it begins with the follower- the student. The student has to ask the question first. Both the student and the teacher contain the guru principle- there is nothing subordinate in the relationship- both have Grace. We call these terms ” chalikripa” the Grace of the student and  “Gurukripa” the Grace of the teacher. The teacher will only help you once you ask- this is dharmic. The teacher will not answer what has not been asked. The guru appears when the student is ready- when the students adikara( studentship) is high enough to have the ability to hear and see the guru. The student must always stay open and questioning for the path is not straight- it is a dance. We form a question and then we are just open and we listen- we wait for the shakti to dance with us.

All of us can dance with the divine- we just need to practice coming back into ourselves- realize the preciousness of the moment. We humble ourselves without putting ourselves down and we look to our strengths and our shadows. We all have talents and tendencies- we all have a heritage of blood and DNA. All these things come together to makes us our unique selves- to make our dance unique. The shakti wants to dance with all of us because of that uniqueness. To stay dancing with the shakti we keep going to our strengths and stop feeding the shadows- sounds simple but it is a lifetime of practice. Every moment of every day is a choice- every moment is a gateway to the heart- can we truly learn to live that way? You can if that is your vision.

Day 5 ended with a guest- Dr. Jacob Liberman. He is an optometrist who now researches light and how it affects us. His story is that during a meditation he had a profound experience of seeing the air between things and a sparkling of something in the space between things. When he came out of meditation his eyesight- which had needed corrective lenses- was vastly improved. He could read things see things he hadn’t before without glasses. The crazy thing his when he hooked himself up to the machine in his office it said his eyesight was unchanged!It led him to question what is it to see and what is seeing?

The eye doesn’t move- it only responds. For example we say ” it caught my eye”. The eye responds to light but no one has ever seen light. It is formless, it has no attributes and no mass. It is the biggest mystery of science. In religion though we have phrases such as ” God is light” – so what is it about light? Why is it so important?

We absorb 2%  of light through our skin and 98% through our eyes. 75% of that light goes from the retina to the hypothalamus and then to the pineal gland which is our biological clock so to speak. Before artificial light we were all entrained ( guru principle ?) with nature by light. Think about rising with the sun and going to bed with it- what a novel idea in our current times.  We all need a certain amount of light to be healthy- in fact studies have shown that populations in northern countries with less sunlight have a higher incidence of multiple sclerosis. Light is necessary for our body to work in harmony with nature.

We also need the dark. Dr. Liberman spoke of how light at night during the time we sleep can affect us by affecting the pineal gland which affects melatonin. Things such as “light pollution” in big cities, night lights or bathroom lights left on at night in our home- can actual affect our patterns of sleep. The pineal is the regulator of all the rest of the regulators of the body- the endocrine system. He took us through an interesting mediation he called the train journey. Seeing which color stations( by the chakra color) we felt like we wanted to get off and visit and which color station we just wanted to go past.  ( I just wanted to hang out in the green station all day)It is based on chromotherapy which is use of color to determine how to better balance your energy. Color is determined by light and the vibration of that light- we don’t see the colours but visualize them and yet there is a perception inside of us interacting with that vibration.

He went on to say that life is looking for us- it is calling to us and we actually have to work to NOT hear it. His experience with light and his sight opened him up to a whole new revelation in thinking. Though a doctor and a student of science, he is also a mystic. Taking time to see that little simple things are really so profound.  “Consider that every instance is a miracle” – Jacob Liberman . Interacting with awareness is a qualitative different experience than thinking. We stop using our thinking and then we see- we see that life has been looking for us, inspiring us, breathing us. Imagine meditating not just once a day but through every minute of every day. What would that be like? I have to say he was a very cool guy. ” There is nothing like direct experience- we confuse the menu for the food”- Jacob Liberman

It was a beautiful way to end a five-day retreat. Five days of exploration, study, practice, absorption- all used in a way that created a deep resonance inside all of us. What we carried away in each of us that week was more than just knowledge- we carried at the cellular level a shift in who we are and how we are in the world. We didn’t just read the menu- we ate the food- and it was delicious. But don’t take my word for it- practice and taste it for yourself…... om

 

Turning Point:Tenki March 11, 2011

Filed under: Anusara,teaching yoga,yoga,yoga therapy — shibuiyoga @ 6:58 am
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My friend Eiko kept saying to me that she could feel a change this year, “tenki” in Japanese,…a turning point. She is so very wise and so very right. There has been a change this year in my teaching, my home life, my deep vision of life. I can’t tell what did it or when it was exactly; but it happened. I now sit in a much deeper seat of sorts and I watch the play of the divine energy of life, the shakti, in a whole new way.

My lack of writing comes from a new offering of my time to yoga therapy. I am in the physio clinic once a week but a whole new group of privates has sprung from that seed and writing has become a luxury. Today I write to you all from- surprise!- Maui. Yes back again to observe and assist an Immersion 3 with Sundari and Skeeter. I hope that by watching these two brilliant souls approach the material I will gain an insight into how I might one day teach an Immersion. The certification process is still on going for me, but I feel I am growing and going deeper in all the right ways.

In the last few months I have spent time with my mentor teacher Robin Golt and her level of wisdom is so deeply humbling. I look to her , and some other teachers I admire very much, and i noticed that many of them are students of  Dr.Paul Muller Ortega’s and so, come fall, I will meet and study with Paul. I had put off this type of deepening of the nonphysical parts of practice until certification was over but really…what am I waiting for? We all seem to need signs…I figure signs are there for those of us too thick  headed to hear Shakti calling us….”huh? me? oh ME???”  Yes- it sometimes takes me a while to get the message.

So I am getting better at listening and in that there is an unfolding, a profound deep wisdom that unfurls in your heart- a flower waiting for the light of consciousness to shine on it. I AM THAT…..whoa..can I please go back to ignorance ?This whole new thing has such a weight of responsibility to it that you cannot ignore it…you can’t go back. You have hit a turning point and everything has shifted…are you ready for it?

The practice of yoga can make us ready….. if we practice from the heart. There will be more turning points in my life , in all of our lives, because an upward spiral needs to turn to continue it’s climb. Like kundalini, the energy of shakti rising through us, we flow through the turns and move and dance our way back home…to our deepest, best selves.

 

Be Here Now 40th Anniversary- Part Two October 18, 2010

” I am loving awareness” – Ram Dass

Day Two of the weekend workshop started with John Friend talking about the significance of numbers, rhythm, patterns and how they are all connected. I was scribbling down notes as fast as I could but to be honest as I try to read them back they are hard to decipher. You see my linguistic tendencies also came out of a need to avoid all algebra and stats classes….Japanese no problem…numbers……hmmm not so good….

I will try to find the highlights that were new to me and that don’t need deep mathematical understanding…

Today was 10/10/ 10. John took the number ten and explained as two 5’s. The flower of Shakti or the goddess’ is the red hibiscus..it has 5 petals. In the vibratory world, the highest vibration is white ( Shiva) and the slowest is red ( Shakti). I have no idea what flower is Shiva’s! So basically the number 5 is the number of life.

The idea was first there is 2, for example Sun and Moon. The energy between these contrary compliments is 3. The number 4 represents the stability that holds them in relation and 5 is the spiral….is the activation of the expansion and contraction of the relationship.

The number 10 is a 1 and 0. It is the creation of the binary rhythm of all life. There was something in there about the binary system creating wave patterns and that things like crystal and silica can resonate these wave patterns and that is why they are used in computers. The 0 also represents in Sanskrit “shunyata” – the void. But that which appears to be empty is completely full. The 1 then represents the sperm and the 0 the egg and from that all creation is born. Something to look up and research yourself when you are surfing the net.

We had a super juicy hip opener practice in which my leg was behind my head and I rolled down and back up but was too scared to stand up- that was pretty far for me already!  That may have been one of the deepest I have ever been in that pose. It also helps we warmed up for an hour towards it!

Ram Dass came back in the afternoon for satsang. Today he told the story of the Hanuman murti ( holy statue) that is currently housed in Taos, New Mexico. Maharaji’s devotee’s would build temples for him all over India. So Ram dass decided as a devotee that they should build a temple in America. The temple would need a murti so he went to Jaipur to the families that been making murtis for generations and found the family that specialized in Hanuman. Now usually Hanuman murtis are with Hanuman kneeling or Hanuman standing.  Ram Dass, recalling the story of Hanuman flying across the ocean to Lanka in the Ramayana carrying Ram’s ring to Sita, decided, since America was across the ocean, the murti should be of a flying Hanuman. Well, the family just looked at Ram Dass in astonishment. No one had ever made a flying Hanuman- how would he stay up? No, they didn’t want to do it.

I am not sure how Ram Dass persuaded them but somehow they agreed to make a marble Hanuman and created a large cape for him to hide the post which supports him in his flying pose. Hanuman then travelled from India to San Francisco where the devotees debated where he should be housed. One of the devotee’s had a farm near Taos so that is where Hanuman came to rest. That location, over the next few years, developed into what is today the Neem Karoli Baba Ashram in Taos, New Mexico.

One of the funny asides that Ram Dass told us is that to bless the murti- to breathe life into it- there must be a ceremony. He laughed as he told us their were two factions: one that  wanted Brahmans and a proper Hindu ceremony and the the others that were stoned and just wanted to climb naked into the crate with Hanuman. I never did find out which faction won out…..

Ram Dass then gave us all a great insight to his personal practice- his “sadana”. He explained he was a Bhakti yogi-a yogi who finds oneness through the path of devotion- and he said ” sadana, in my game- is who you think you are..and who you think you are is mostly based on fear- identifying with the individual “I”.”

He explained this further by saying he thought he was Dr. Richard Albert, he was a Harvard prof, he was a Freudian, he was a ..etc etc…all the titles and labels the individual “I” wants to hold on to. He said the real “I”  is not in the mind but in the heart and in the heart you are awareness.  ” I am loving awareness” – he whispered.” I am loving awareness”.

“You will never find your awareness”, he said,  “you ARE awareness”. “You stay there in your heart”, he explained, “and you stop identifying with all the thoughts.”

“I am loving awareness” is a thought but it is a thought that takes you to a subject not an object. You can’t focus on it because it is no thing, nothing…..it’s cool”.

” Everything I am aware of I love”, Ram Dass said. He talked about loving the wall, loving the room – it was quite funny. He then told a story about how one of his friends called him on it. It went something like this.

“So are you telling me, Ram Dass, that you love everything?”

” Yes”

“You love me?”

“Yes”

“You love that rug?”

“Yes- I love the rug”

“Hmm…”

His friend used to phone him and say, “This is your rug calling….” I just about rolled over laughing!

Ram Dass told us when he is looking at the world from his soul he finds the world beautiful and lovable. When you love the whole world, including yourself, you merge into a sea of love. There is no action, he explained, love isn’t action, it’s just merging. You don’t have to act. He then took a moment and looked around the room and smiled, ” this room is full of love”.

He then went back to the previous days talk of “being” and “doing”. He explained the difference between the Atman and the Jiva-atman- the One and the embodied soul. Maharaji was the Atman, on that plane, and Ram Dass was the jiva-atman. Seeing Oneness and being Oneness is a difference of spiritual planes of existence, he explained, and it takes Grace to get over that hump. He said that was interesting because people say they feel so loved when I am with him but he didn’t do anything. Wow- he thought- Grace is here- I got some of that. You get pure enough, he said, and then you wait for Grace.

John had a beautiful offering when he said that Ramakrishna had a saying about preparing your boat the best you can and then waiting for the winds of Grace. ” The waves will take you to the shore” John said quoting Rumi.

Feeling small, Ram Dass said, is a thought. Insecurity is a thought. Atman is so big- I am so small. The ego tells you that you cannot be him ( Maharaji). It’s still a thought- it’s who you think you are. You gotta be somebody before you’re nobody……

We seem, to me, that we have to shed the layers all over again to get back to that one original Atman…and  that is a part of the game- the sadana as Ram Dass put it- that we all have.

We then had a Q and A session with some interesting stuff coming up. We had the typical psychedelic questions- every time I am with Ram Dass this comes up- and he was good natured about it. He really nailed it when someone asked about getting to that plane of the Atman through drugs and Ram Dass said- ” it get’s you into the room but you can’t stay. All those guys [that took psychedelics] were nothing like Maharaji. He could stay in the room.” I then asked about Maharaji’s lineage as many teachers came from lineages ( ie. Nityananda, Baba Muktananda, Gurumai…) Apparently Maharaji was from a village near Agra but his beginnings are not well known. He was actually married with three children which I found surprising. According to his children he was a very good father- made all the marriage arrangements for his daughters etc. Then we had the most shocking thing occur- John started asking Ram Dass about his family. Family?? I thought….

Well,  apparently a man in his 50’s contacted Ram Dass because he looked so much like him and guess what…it was Ram Dass’ biological son! They just found each other this spring and this man has children so Ram Dass is actually a grandfather. When John said “How wonderful!” Ram Dass looked at him and said ” Why is it wonderful?” It really was one of the first times I saw John kind of at a loss for a moment. Ram Dass was really just making a point that love goes beyond blood and genealogy and that in the heart it doesn’t really change anything. I think he does secretly find it wonderful though! Wow-  I really didn’t see my question going in that direction. Quite the unexpected revelation!

John asked Ram Dass if he wanted to leave the young teachers with a message and this is what he responded:

” God is within you. We have to go inside rather than outside…what you want is what you already have.”


 

Maui Therapy Training Oct/2010 Day 5 October 10, 2010

” The heart is in every cell of the body” – John Friend

This morning started by John asking us to condense all the information of the week and come up with some key principles. These are a few the group came up with:

– Go from the Highest- universal perspective

– Listen and Open – let go of some of the paradigms, be open to shifting

– Curve then length ( form then action)

– Polarity vs Duality

– The cure is in the poison when applied in the right amount

– Stability leads to opening ( stabilize the periphery move from the core)

– the governor of the back is the legs

– intentionality is fundamental to change

– Good alignment is good therapy

and my own that I never said out loud, therapy is establishing a new dominant pulsation in the body.

So Ivy came back today. Yesterday she sat with us after she told us her story and she stayed on stage with John as we all prayed and chanted and guess what….. she came back feeling better today and JOHN HADN’T EVEN TOUCHED HER!! By just listening to her story and making her comfortable and giving her hope, she had already started to feel better.

John said that the krama ( order) of therapy -after first principle- is to go from the ground up. John did a lot of root work on the pelvis to make the energy go down ( apana vayu) because after any trauma the body will naturally pull up energetically.

After grounding her a bit then John went through the following~

1) diagnostic

2) Manual shoulder loop- keeping an eye on the chin level

3) side body long from the back- pulling shoulders onto the back

4) felt the fascia of the head diagnostic

5) neck therapy by one hand on occiput and one on forehead to create a vector by squeezing the two towards each other as she relaxed tongue and jaw and she did shoulder loop for herself

6) diagnostic

7) kidney loop manual adjustment ( she did shoulder loop and John observed the energy in the head and neck

8 ) Standing forward bend with wide stance. ( Better to repeat than hold) John noticed a slight torque. stabilized her coming up to keep the rooting.

9) Laying supine. Tell them you are going to touch them before you do. John rooted her hips straight down and told us to be aware of when you are over top of someone to be slightly off their midline as being on the midline is too invasive.( *this was a really great point)

10) worked her feet a little to get the energy once again to move down

11) aligned all the body: feet up- femurs rooted and inner spiral, kidney loop, shoulder loop

One of things I noticed that I had not addressed in my own thinking was the trauma and what it did to her energetically. The rooting of the energy downwards in the pelvis  and in the feet was really a key point.

We then put everything on the board that we hadn’t yet covered that people had questions about. We grouped them and the started with the most gross ones ( structural things) to the subtle ( auto-immune).

It got a little crazy so I have only a few points on some varied topics. Obviously there are more in depth things you can do but some of these the basic thing to look at.

TMJ- usually flat neck 9 out of 10 times. Balance shoulders and build neck muscles. Don’t be surprised if their mouth  guard doesn’t fit.

Sciatica– Rubbing the piriformis dosen’t really work as it is a receptor of tightness in another area. A diagnostic is putting them on their belly and watching to see if the butt lifts up when you fold back the leg. Get the quads stretched out and the psoas flowing downward. Check spine after if no relief because it could be a disc issue. If after all that still pain send for follow up with MD.

Osteoporosis– get the alignment and then the circulation will flow better and the minerals will be in better dynamisim. Moving is better than not moving.

Knee/ACL– “drawer test” as diagnostic. Sitting  on the floor get the client to put foot on your foot and keeping the base often tibia back, track foot in a line as you move the leg up and down. Will also help reduce swelling in the knee. If you are getting ACL surgery tell them not to tighten it so much and then work the principles like crazy as the surgeons will tend to over-stabilize after injury.

Migraines- usually related to levator scapula and the rhomboids. Tends to be that the migraine presents more on one side. Often migraines have to do with environmental triggers etc which are out of our control but we can help mitigate with good alignment. Viparita karanai ( legs up the wall) may be used as treatment but it will initially INCREASE the severity of the migraine. After 10 minutes bring them up to sit supported at the wall and as the blood drains down it will often take the migraine down significantly.

Colitis/ Crones- usually have a flat thoracic. get the curves back in the spine and work on getting the energy to flow downward as it is usually stuck or flowing upwards.

MS– Most MS clients have a steady raised heart rate all the time. Use a heart rate monitor for accuracy and do variation exercises to get the pulse up and then go into a deep relaxation and when heart rate goes down for a bit go back to high heart rate activity and repeat. Short burst of activity and relaxation will help reprogram the pulsation of the body.

My mind is now feeling very full. What John has learned over 30 years he passed down in 5 days- it was incredible.  I was thinking if I could condense all 5 days of therapy training into one sentence what would it be……

“Honor the Spirit and align the outer form – from that all freedom will flow”

om namah shivaya

 

The Dharma of Teaching September 8, 2010

I have been considering the role of the teacher lately. What does the teacher help us do? I think we can all agree on a little list that says something like…helps us learn new information, keeps us accountable to someone, directs our learning. But what does a great teacher do?

Think back to all the teachers you have had in your life- school teachers, sports coaches, relatives, friends- the role of the teacher comes manifested in many forms. Now think back to the ones that really stick out in your mind and bring a fondness of memory- what made these teachers different from all the others? What made them so significant in your memory? I know for me they are the ones that inspired me- that literally breathed life into my realm of imagination and animated new possibilities.  Even to have one teacher like that in our lives is a blessing; I have been blessed with more than one.

Sometimes when I am teaching I have had students approach me after class and tell me things like how ” the class spoke exactly to what I needed to hear” and ” how did you know what I was thinking?” I had one student even say that my classes have changed her life. I have to be honest with you and say my first reaction wasn’t ” Hey- cool!” it was more like” NO- I don’t want that responsibility!”.  I had to ground a little and remind myself that what was happening was good and natural- that as students started opening they would look to me as the agent of that change. But thankfully, because of one of my teachers John Friend, I know more clearly what is happening. For a great teacher is just a conduit of light, a beautiful pure light that allows the students to see more clearly in an often dark place. The teacher becomes the mirror merely reflecting back the realm of possibility inside the student and the student starts to see what has always been there- their own power.

This sounds simple but to be a conduit is not easy- you must be strong inside and out. The conduit carries the light but must not confuse itself by identifying as the light. When teachers identify as the light, as the transformative power itself, than their ego becomes misaligned. They become ego driven and then all sorts of ugliness arises: jealousy, fear, narcissism, and greed. The teacher must always remember the source of their power and realize that it is the students Grace- chali-kripa in Sanskrit-  that allows them to take the seat of the teacher. When the teacher holds that remembrance they can be dynamic and successful but always humble. In yoga, teachers prepare through meditation and asana to be the conduit but I have had many great teachers that were not yogi’s- how does that happen? If they do not meditate and do asana how do they become such amazing conduits?

I think the answer is Love. All my teachers that were great loved what they did and loved their students. I often think to Ram Dass speaking of his teacher Maharaji ( Neem Karoli Baba) and saying that his power was the ability to love everybody. When we love someone unconditionally we give them the confidence and support to go inside. Love comes from the heart, it is not tempered by the ego, and therefore the teacher that teaches from love is always aligned. I believe that mediation and asana can help the love get stronger but the love must be there first- the love of sharing, the love of empowering others, the love of seeing someone grow into who they are in their heart.

Some teachers are only with us for a short time. They see us in a only a small fraction of our life and then they are left wondering if their students did realize their potential- did the teacher make a difference? We are human, and though we really shouldn’t be seeking out affirmation, I thought about how as the student I should be telling my great teachers that they were great- that they had made a difference in my life. For this is the dharma of the teacher- to affect change in a positive way. So I have began to seek them out one by one…

I had coffee with my Grade 2 teacher last week- I hadn’t seen her in over 30 years. I sent her a letter a few months ago to tell her what an influence she was in my life and how her business trip to Japan with her husband in 1977 changed my life. She had come back full of enthusiasm with wonderful photos and kimono’s for us to touch and rice crackers for us to taste and a beautiful doll in a glass case for us to gaze upon. Her love of sharing greatly affected me and to her shock and amazement her small influence changed my life. I have a University degree in Japanese Studies, lived in Japan for many years and speak fluent Japanese. My connection with Japan brings such happiness to me that it is hard to imagine that door may have never opened if it not been for her. She was so amazed  to get my letter and she said it was every teacher’s dream that they had a student tell them that they made a difference. We plan on meeting for coffee a lot more often now!

Every time we teach we have the opportunity to awaken something in the student. I like to think that rather than focusing on that if we simply focus on becoming the best conduit that we can be- full of love, enthusiasm and gratitude – the awakenings will naturally happen…for both the students and the teacher.

And go find an old teacher and tell them how great they were and why…..

Neem Karoli Baba

 

Certification: The Process July 25, 2010

I debated what to call this post. For you see it has been so long since I have written because I have been in the “certification process” of Anusara Yoga and in the “process” have had little time to write as all my creative time ( what little I have) has been poured into making the video perfect class. So you can see there will a trade off for writing my blog and there will be no brilliant class this week but no worries..I am taking the month of August off teaching to recharge.

Everyone who is not in the certification process keeps asking me about it so I thought I would share my thoughts on it. First of all- it is not called a process randomly. The idea of processing has a faint hint of the idea of time in it and that definitely is true about certification. It takes time….lots of it. My nature is one of a pitta when it comes to time things…I think I have a personal mantra of ” get it done…NOW!” But then again I am a busy person with a busy husband and two busy children and another busy job besides yoga. It is not because I do not enjoy slow- in fact I kinda love slow but it seems to be such a rare element in my life. Christina Sell told me she got me to organize things for her once because she said that if you want something done give it to a busy person. Yup – that is moi.

But in the certification process you can not be “busy”- it is like making cider versus wine…I think. You see, I once accidentally made cider by leaving apple juice in a warm fridge in a motorhome that jiggled it for two days. Voila- cider. Wine can take years…I want my teaching to be like wine- full bodied, fruity, slight acidity, complex bouquet and just a little intoxicating. Cider is great but it isn’t wine…  Anything really worth while takes time- it should take time. At first I freaked out when the feedback I got showed all my little flaws that needed attention and the mala of heart came in but I now look back at where I started and how I teach now and I ask myself, ” Have you improved?” and I have. I have improved a lot…and I am still improving. But it takes time to take feedback, implement it and really feel it become natural to your teaching.

Now the feedback part- get ready for some things that may seem contrary to how your other teachers have taught you. This really can drive you crazy if you fight it ….”but this teacher said THIS and now you say THAT…” It is not that your mentor or board member is trying to drive you off the deep end but what they may look for in your teaching may not be what previous teachers taught. You might be more of a flow style teacher and they may have you teach all the poses from standing, you may be a real technical teacher and they will tell you to give the students more space and just move the shakti. Your brilliantly original classes that rock your students daily may receive feedback to simplify and go back to “inner body bright” rather than “the nuclear power of spirit rising through you like 4th of July fireworks” ..ok that was total nonsense but you get my drift. What they want to see in the video is the METHOD of Anusara.

The most brilliant advice I got from another certified teacher was just to do exactly what your mentor asks and then exactly as your board mentor asks- even if they are totally contradictory. It may seem contradictory but each teacher is looking for something in you that they base on what they think is valuable for an Anusara teacher- they are not trying to torment you. In the big picture having teachers ask you for something you may find almost counter-intuitive will only broaden your teaching skills and may bring something to your teaching that you had never even though about. It’s all good.

Written exam first or video first- that is another question I get a lot. That is like the chicken and the egg. I did my written test first and am now working on the video and I have friends who did it the other way around and loved that. I think it is totally personal. One friend commented that they would have written different answers had they done the test after the video but I still feel good about the order I did it in.

Now here is the stuff you need to know that other people may neglect to tell you.

You need your own video camera or total access to one..and a tripod. You will have to play with your camera a bit to figure out how to tape and then how to download videos from the camera to your computer and how to make multiple copies. This may sound easy- it can be difficult and time consuming. Also if you buy a Sony handycam it does not work with Apple..ya helllooooo…that was a cruel surprise. Thank God we have a PC laptop so I didn’t have to buy a new camera when the old PC quit and we replaced it with an Mac.

Start taping your classes now! Get a feel for how your class looks on camera and where to place the students. You also need to see where to place yourself for centering and demos. If the teacher viewing it cannot see it well they they cannot give you clear feedback. Starting to tape before the process can clear away the technical so you can focus on just the teaching. If you teach at a few locations tape them all- one may have better lighting and layout for taping and then you can compare them.

Teach the same class all week and tape the ones later  in the week if you don’t want to tape them all. I found I worked some bugs out in the earlier classes and wound up with a better class at the end of the teaching week that was more suitable to tape. You can tape all your classes and then just go back and watch the ones you think you really knocked it out of the park on. There are some classes you tape that you know will not meet the criteria and it is up to you but I usually delete these ones right away as the time to review a class can take 2-3 hours.

When you review your classes get out the criteria sheets for self evaluation and teacher evaluation from the Anusara website. Look for the things that the evaluators are looking for. If you miss more then one then it may not be “send in” material but check with your teacher about what they want to look at. Remember that could be 2-5 hours of their time to review your video.

Well that is about it. I could say more but really- you just have to go through it yourself. You will have your own experience of the path to share with others- hopefully some of this may help you in your journey. Enjoy the process….

 

Anusara Teachers Intensive Tokyo 2010 April 6, 2010

Inari Shrine- Shinto sees spirit in everything

I just left the girls and said I wasn’t writing tonight because I was so tired but here I am!  I practiced three times today so my body is a bit wacked out- my teacher says, ” Come practice with us” and I don’t even think I just go. Rare opportunity now a days.

Today was intro day for the teachers intensive and we started right into one of the most basic things to do in your class. Ready for this? Greet the students.

I know you think “of course” but in many classes, in many styles, this is not the case. We are making a safe place for our students where they feel welcome and you are building a relationship of trust. Saying hello and making someone feel welcome may do more than the whole next hour of asana. Such a little thing.

We talked about holding the space and making a “mandir” or temple and holding your intention from the invocation all the way to the end. The two highest reasons for practicing yoga are  CHIT and ANANDA. This is a spiritual practice that we do in our bodies. You have to tell the students why they want their arms straighter , why the need to pay attention to foundation. Many people come to me and say ‘” Anusara-oh yeah- spirals and loops right??’  I just cringe! At least more people are coming to me now and saying. ” Anusara- oh yeah- Shri and Shakti“.  It is easy to fall into the technical trap when you teach Anusara but of you do you are not really honoring the highest teachings and it just becomes a physical education class. They might feel really good after but it would be a good class- not a great class. How do you make good into great? That is what John is trying to teach us.

We spent the morning creating a class all together with a theme, a heart quality, and apex pose. We then looked at what type of poses could led us to the apex pose. John then took what we had created as a group and taught that class with lots of pausing for explaination and clarity. I think it worked well.

I am too tired to write more tonight but I will use Pamela Walsh’s 6 word story to summarize the day:

Always start from the universal-spirit

Manas sees difference- buddhi sees universal

Open To Grace has two parts

Inner body bright- melt the heart

Sequencing- Do forward bends before backbends 

Spirit- One light in many colours out

Alignment is rules without the why

Do not be dogmatic- remember why

Play your instrument in the orchestra

Celebrate diversity and glorify the universal

We are the embodiment of spirit

Inari - shinto god of rice, agriculture, fertility & business

 

Tokyo Immersion 2010 – Day One April 2, 2010

Today started too early for me as my body naturally woke up at 4;30…and didn’t go back to sleep. My little hotel room is very cute and clean and very new looking. I had enough room to meditate; yoga was kind of out of the question. My hotel serves the best small breakfast. I was so happy to see salad for breakfast. At home, salad may seem strange at such an early hour but really it is one of my favorite things in the morning. I happily downed toast and Japanese scrambled eggs ( think very, very wet…almost uncooked…) coffee and a huge plate of salad. Manzoku- very satisfied.

On a travel note, I would like to say that I really enjoy the Japanese Inn Group  for Japanese B&B style hotels( being a traditional Japanese room with futon, japanese bath etc.) but ,for $30 dollars more, the Comfort Hotel has laundry, a great breakfast, private bathroom with decent tub, and internet. In todays age of computers it really is nice to sit here and write than to drag myself to an internet cafe every night. Rakuten lists many types of hotels so check that out if you are coming to Japan and other places in Asia. If you are not lugging the computer and want to experience something special check out Japanese Inn Group- especially in Kyoto.

Day one of the Immersion was very special as it was the first class ever taught in the new Studio Yoggy location in Hibiya. It is the most open and light filled of any of the studios I have been to in Japan. It is in a perfect location and Sawako- the owner- is so pleased to final have what she calls the flagship location. John made a beautiful introduction that morning to the idea that the  place we do yoga is scared space dedicated to the freedom of everyone- a place to awaken. The flagship is the hub, the hub is the heart- the place of spirit. The invocation was so beautiful I had this wild image of the voices as spirit running like curls of leaves and vines through everything in the studio- the floor, the mats, the bolsters, the walls- we were making sacred space. One of the visiting teachers said it was the first time he had ever cried during the invocation- it was that powerful.

One of the Japanese teachers- Misato-san- who I met the first time in Japan 3 years ago suffered the loss of her mother recently. John was so very sweet when he said ” we cry when someone passes because there is so much love”. He asked us to consider of at the end of our days what do we want. If there is peace, love and happiness then we have aligned with spirit. Sprit wants us to be happy, it wants to align with us- it is our true nature.

But we forget. We don’t feel happy or peaceful or feel love. We long and desire for that feeling again. We want to be free. It is the classic story of those with great material wealth being unhappy and those with very little being completely content. Which one is truly free? This is such a hard thing for us to grasp in Western culture. It really frustrates the heck out of me. I find as I have been practicing yoga I need less and less- or I want less and less. As long as the basics are covered- food, clothing, etc. I am perfectly satisfied. It is so freeing. I wish for the people I love to be free like that.

John’s morning practice was one of sensitivity and commitment. These are the two key principles of how you align with spirit. It is the two principles for any good relationship I think. It was a fairly simple practice but very deep. I was getting a little frustrated though as the mats are brand new and my trikonasana was turning into hanumanasana and I feel on my head in one leg wheel ( ekahasta dhanurasana).  I clawed so hard my fingers are still sore as I type!

The afternoon was a discussion of the philosphy of Anusara Yoga. The philosophy should answer the deepest questions of life: Why are we here? What is my purpose? What is the purpose of life?

The questions can all be answered by yoga, John explained. There is an inate intelligence inside all of us- it comes from the intelligence of spirit. Things grow in a deep orderly manner- on the outside we may all look different, but our cellular level all started the exact same way. How did it know how to do that? John went over the Golden Ratio ( 1.618) and I always find that fascinating. If you make a fist and turn your hand to the side so it has the curl of your fingers right side up the distance from the top of your index finger to where it curls in will be a ratio of one and and from the curl down to your wrist a ratio of 1.618. From you middle finger to your wrist a ratio of 1 and from your wrist to your elbow 1.618. Wild isn’t it?

Frm here we talked about the aspects of the Universal ( shiva-shakti, no form, no limit, completely free, sat/chit ananda/, spanda and purna) which went into the introduction of the tattvas ( principles of existence).  The top 5 tattvas- those that are in the universal realm- actually contain all the other 36 tattvas but there are at the highest vibration. Everything in existence is just stepped down vibrations of the 5 top ones. As I wrote in Kyoto, the problem with describing this higher tattvas is that they belong to the universal which is really something beyond words. As soon as we name it we have made it relative- subject to our understanding in this realm. I mean this is really heady stuff and as a teacher of this method it can get really challenging when you chose to go into that place.

One of the graphs John showed us today was one I don’t think I have seen before where you line the top tattvas along side the elements and the principles. For the teachers out there you might like this:

Shiva=Open to Grace= Space

Shakti= Muscular Enery=Earth

Iccha= Inner Spiral= Water

Jnana= Outter Spiral= Fire

Kriya= Organic Energy= Air

Putting Shiva/Shakti in the mix was interesting to think about because then you get Earth and Sky- the two things  we did in the morning: sensitivity and commitment- voila!

We spent the afternoon going over the rest of the Universal principles : Open to Grace, Muscular Energy etc. and dove into the spirals. We had a great question about where inner and outter spiral start and stop and the group was getting a little stuck so I thought about how I teach with the ribbons and John graciously allowed Yasushi-san and I to tie him up with white and purple straps. I think it was effective…hilarious for sure. I  hope someone got a picture!

John’s afternoon practice was so simple- all the basics. Three parts of muscular energy, three parts of organic- each principle in order and culminating, the focal points. Good basic stuff. We did some very yummy hip and supine stuff and it made such a great end to the day. We even got to surprise Yasushi-san with a cake and a round of happy birthday right after meditation! The meditation bell went signalling the end and then all these little fire crackers went off full of ribbons. So much fun!

We ended the day with a sharing session. One of the questions we had to answer was ” What is Grace”? I will leave that for you to contemplate and you can share your answers in the comments if you like.

Oyasumi….